Archive for February, 2011

February 15, 2011

Rachael…. Rachael, Rachael, Rachael. What can I say about Rachael?

Nothing. The pictures say it all.

But seriously I am going to say something. It’s hard to think of someone else that could make an old couch look good. Heck, who else could make looking down look so good. Nobody that’s who. And if anybody has a problem with that you can say it to Rachael’s face. Don’t say it to mine though because I am fragile.

I’m sure at some point you might ask me ” Hey annonymous person writing this, who is that other beautiful person in those pictures?”

Which I will reply “What’s it to you!”

But after the horrible beating that will incur to me after I have said that, I will say “That is Morgan, sister of Rachael, Princess of all of Narnia.”

Then hopefully you will walk off and leave me be. Please, leave me be. You already broke my fragile face. What else could you want from me?

And that’s the end of my story. I want to thank Rachael and Morgan for being such fabulous sports.

And to everyone else, I hope to see you here next week.

And I just want to throw out an extra personal thank you to Rachael for introducing me to Jeggings. They saved my life!!


February 15, 2011

 Ladies I would like to introduce you to Matthew. He is young, studly, and once had a man cave.

He is 5’11, 150 or possibly 160 pounds. I don’t really know I am just using my eyes to guess. So watch as he:

– Clasps his hands

– Does the fantastic Thinker Pose

– Scratches his chin pondering the meaning of life

– Leans against an old gas pump

– Stands dangerously on an active railroad track

All things that qualify a real fatal attraction. So hurry up and get your own Matthew at your local Walmart before items run out.

Did I mention he had a man cave?!


February 15, 2011

There ain’t nothin like a man and his truck…. and a field of grass, and an abandoned gas station.  But all of these backgrounds mean nothing if the person in front of the camera doesn’t flow well with them. But Sean flows like that field of grass I mentioned before. He draws your eyes directly to him. That is why you probably didn’t realize there was a truck, a field of grass and an abandoned gas station behind him.

But there is I promise you that.

Just squint your eyes and tilt your head a little.  You may also have to push really hard to get the blood to your eyes. Unfortunately this also means that one vein on your head will probably pop out. But it’s worth it.

You can’t be wearing contacts or glasses, as well as a sweater vest or tube socks. I also recommend you view them at dawn when the sun is just peaking beyond the horizon.

Just then, you might be able to see the background. But there are no guarantees!!